Lex Remlap-P
03 Yuno's Theme03:33

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I think it's been about two months since I've released anything. I've been in a major funk. For the first month, I've been tied up with Genshin Impact. Since online time in cell space is a premium for me, any time I am in range it's time for internet things, music being an offline thing will be reserved for offline time... Except it's been pretty hectic. That and the power usage, but thankfully I did manage to get the solar panels working, so free power! The second month I've been socializing with the person that's been kind enough to let us park on their property for a bit. Being 10 miles out of cell range, a call for help is nowhere near if something happens. And in socializing I've found my own personal energy tainted with other people's energy... I've been massively depressed, anxious, unable to sit down and do the things I enjoy, unable to just take a walk, or see my friends back in Des Moines, 1800 miles away... It's been rough on me. I've been recording making music and uploading the streams to Youtube, but most streams I either delete, or don't upload since I go 4 hours into a song and then just... delete the whole project. I look in the mirror and think... this isn't who I am.. this isn't me. I'm living a life that isn't me, I'm making choices that aren't my usual choices... I know what needs to be done to break out of this funk, but the strength and will to do that are different stories. Maybe I just need to listen to more music... I was able to finish a song for my book series, Yuno's Theme. I've been playing around with the orchestra in BBC Symphony Orchestra by Spitfire Audio. It's a free program, check it out. Anyway, Yuno (19) is Yona's (22) little goth mage sister. She is a bit of a flirt, and has a way of getting into trouble because of it. She loves cat ear boys, and 10 minutes after traveling into a new world with Yona, she finds a cat ear man... This song is an attempt to capture the essential energy of Yuno. There will be more themes for each character, but they will be released on a special soundtrack to accompany the book. The first book has yet to be published, I'm waiting to make sure I've made all the changes needed for the second book, like "How can she speak the language of the new world, when no one taught her, and they don't know her own language..." that sorta thing. And lastly, music related, I wanted to release two songs today, one is in progress... The instrumentals are finished, but I need to get the lyrics in and then scrutinize it until I'm ready to release it. I'm taking the month of august off from videogames, weed, alcohol, anything really that will poison my mind. I want to clean out my self, and be ready for September. 12 years ago I bought the 430.00 USD Rosetta Stone Japanese level 1, 2, and 3 course. I studied for a few months, but lost steam. Now the CDROM is useless, they don't support it, there is nothing that can be done on my end to make those discs work. They offered a 3 month subscription if I redeem my software key. My plan is to study every moment of every day that I'm online and get as much progress made as I can before I consider buying their permanent service for 180.00 USD. Hopefully by the end of 3 months, I will be able to read write and speak Japanese... I think if I apply myself, I can consider this a college course, and get it done! Why am I telling you this? Because it means I might take a break from music for 3 months, but it also means that my instance of Hatsune Miku will now be able to sing in her native tongue... and I can then make music in Japanese! Oh and watch anime raw, one week before the subtitles come out... Anyway, music is still a focus in life, it's my way of feeling some purpose, and worth... maybe even a short soap box. I'm glad you all have crossed my path, I appreciate the words of support and the encouraging messages like "When are you coming out with more music?" Those are good motivators, really remind me that I have grown a lot since when I first started releasing publicly. I'm almost at 800 subscribers, I've almost hit 700,000 plays... I've made 25.00 USD in royalties since 2018 or so. Stick around, I'm not giving up. I can't give up, making music is an antidepressant for me... its my medication, it's who I am. It's not an option to just give up. I've been doing this since 2008, there is no giving up at this point. Until next time, I might not be able to send a news letter when the other song is released, so keep an eye out.