In this world, there dose not seem to be enough time to do what we really want to do..........letting other things distract from our main priorities and the feeling of being way behind in life and goals.....it's all can be so dam depressing....yet, there is that still small voice inside my mind that tells me, "things will get better, if I only do this or that and keep my Promises to myself......Sound about right? Then stubborn me, pushes away, the exact things that just might help me get to where I need to be in life........especially my not having any patience, or real actual love for myself........all because I was a victim of Child abuse as a Child and NEVER being happy.....All my life, I have had an innocent approach to life and other people.....only to be taken advantage of.....In & Out of children's homes since 9 or 10 years old.....Then graduating to Prison since 1989, due to my Drug addictions, that I used to help numb the pain.(Accumulating 17 Years, in and out of Prison's)...right up until just 7 years ago, when I got on the Methadone Program.....and now that seems to be holding me back....even though it saved my life........While in Prison, I wrote over 600 songs......and found my own style.....and even played Concerts for the Prison Inmates......(Got Two DVDs) worth of the actual Prison Concerts......Anyway......having no real friends, or any type of social life (No girlfriends for years)....No lie....I really don't have anyone I can trust to talk to....So, I keep to myself and try and figure everything out by myself.....I have a Psychologist I get some therapy from, but I can't trust them either.....I remember as a kid (13-14 Years old) girls used to see/hear me play my guitar with a Kid Band I was in (Kanal Kids) and since I had very low self esteem from being beaten (I mean Beaten the crap out of and Emotionally Abused) I would tell them to get the hell away from me and asked, what do you want from me)......I never had any confidence in myself........and I was always angry; to push people away........Now, I seem to understand myself better and realize that, it was not my fault and the things people go through as children, really does affect them as adults.....Like a Dog, if you treat it bad as a Puppy, it will not trust you, its whole entire life.....I really WANT to get my songs OUT THERE.......for people to hear & enjoy.....so, the things I need to overcome are not easy; but I have to! For Me! If not for anybody else.....because I still have a really hard time trusting people; especially with this BLM and ANTIFA crap going on.....I think everybody is tired of it all......I mean, killing children? Destroying businesses....? Demanding reparations......(The state of Texas?) Yeah, I was in the military but that only made me more aggressive; so I got my trainning and let that help build my esteem and Discipline...... The Bottom Line here Is this: If I do try to go all the way with my Music.....I am doing it for me.....to prove to MYSELF that I can overcome my Demons and when I leave this Crazy world.....maybe I touched a few peoples' lives in a positive way and helped them face and overcome their Demons too! I have a New 12 song CD I am working on, called, "ONLY THE STRONG SURVIVE".....very appropriate for my what I went through.......Please be patient; I don't have anyone to help me and I am doing all the instruments myself....I should be able to present the title track Singe, by December......or early spring and this time I have my whole heart, Soul and mind into it.....It's going to be the Best music on the planet! And I need to say this also.....it's NOT going to be Cheap to buy.....for all the Hard work I'm putt into it......I even stopped smoking pot & Beer, so I can have a Clear Head doing it....... I need all your Prayers........Please keep having Faith in me......as I in you..... Thank you all for your Love & Support..... Be safe, Live well & ROCK ON! P.S. I do have some New Demos I can put up.....in like a few days.....just to change my songs I have on this N1M Site! Peace & Love! Yours Truly, Greg The axis Demeter